मेरी मित्र सूची - क्या आप सूची में है ?

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Why ashamed being a HOMEMAKER ?


do read ............ and let me have ur views .......
Poonam matia

Females working in various sectors are now earning big income packages worth lakhs annually. Seeing this, most women consider themselves incompatible and second grade –in fact, they feel ashamed being called ‘Just housewives’.

The common reason for this is the misconception that most housewives are either engaged in feeding the family or they are busy ‘showing off their jewellery’ and gossiping whereas the actual situation is just the reverse. A large portion of women who remain at home, instead of going for nine to five jobs, engage themselves in taking care of family members at home , training the next generation for the LIFE. 

Long back, around nineteen years ago ,when I Left my permanent PGT teacher’s job from a reputed private school , many a people (including my mom, too) said, ‘ What’s the use of studying so much when ultimately you have to sit at home…… if you did some job that would have been better … that way you would have contributed significantly to family’s income’.…….. This statement still haunts my mind and forces me to think again and again, ‘whether only ‘working outside home’ adds on to the income of the family?’ 

Dear friends what is your thinking about this ?????? 

If you ask me ,then I’ll say that instead of direct income ,the indirect income which a Housewife earns, is better in many respects. 

Household management , children’s upbringing , looking after their food ,clothing ,illness education, etc besides their ethical character is always better in our own supervision rather than under paid help. This not only saves on money but also an investment for their better future. 

Lets for a minute think, keeping aside their contribution to family, about the WOMAN herself …… we will come to the conclusion that a female can ,if she so desires, groom herself better in areas of her interests, she can acquire and get skilled in various arts ,if the family supports her. This kind of additional creative abilities are mostly difficult, if not impossible, with a full time job. 

This can be illustrated with this example …. Most school teachers remain focused and busy in completing syllabus and while doing so they completely forget to judge whether their teachings are going to child’s mind or not ,whether they are performing their duty of wholesome development of their students or not …………? 

No , no we can’t be inhuman in expecting so much from these humble creatures of God. As the school would punish them if the students don’t perform and pass the school examinations, they would be least bothered , ‘if the child passes the life’s exam or not’. I do, 100%, agree that women posted on high levels would certainly earn money more than housewives , but for that how many compromises they would have to make in the life……. It’s very difficult even to imagine. It’s my request to working women not to take my words otherwise, as I’m just not intending to say anything against them. 

An educated woman does a lot for the family and herself even if she is not ‘working’. And she still can do more which could be much more on mental, and social level than just monetary contribution. I have worded the duties and glory of a homemaker in a composition …… and I feel that You all … would agree with the Candid Torch ….called Homemaker by all .. 

THE HOME MAKER>>>>> Nature ‘there’, Nurture ‘here’ 

Whether sweet or sour God takes care of child’s ‘nature’
Reins of ‘nurture’ are entrusted with the HOMEMAKER. 

Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesh, the divine Trinity, 
Looks after the world to retain its sanctity. 
No lesser is the role of a homemaker,
Howsoever, insignificant is ‘HER’ stature.

A loving kiss, patting cheeks and a subtle, gentle stroke, 
Thumping shoulders, a warm cuddle, a reassuring poke,
A stern command, burning anger ,a hard unwilling slap,
Such emotional TOOLS come handy to her at every step.

A great Feeder, a Cleaner, a Tailor, a Technician,
Launderer, Vigilant Supervisor and a Beautician,
A HOMEMAKER needs to be all in one, on toes 24 by 7
Always sublimated jack of all but master of none.

‘Greens’ brewing oxygen worth crores, taken for granted.
So is the tireless, humble HOMEMAKER goes undaunted.

With best possible use of time, one must not hesitate in going on for higher education or skill improvement courses. The inner creative points should be identified and effort should be done to sharpen them instead of wasting time inwatching futile tv serials for hours and hours . 

In addition, I would call upon male counterparts to come out of their indifferent attitude that their wives or the non-working females in the house ‘don’t do anything’. In fact they should also eliminate this so called ‘ Joru ka gulaam’ attitude and leave their false ‘EGO’ to help and support the wife to strengthen her positive and creative side. 

Dear friends, today at this juncture of my life when I stand and look back at me and my family , I assure you all that I don’t feel a damn that I decided to leave my job to become a full time HOUSEWIFE……….

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Relationship does matter …… a few golden rules

Life is love and love is life. Hindi cinema, largely, rotates around love stories. Stories involving heroes and heroines, mostly, struggling and fighting the families and situations, throughout the movie to have their love and get married. The movies mostly end at that with a slogan or ending ‘And they lived happily ever after.’ 

What a naked lie! That too, told so boldly. I and you, in fact , all are aware that the life or we can say ,the struggle actually begins and not end at marriage . People don’t understand that the amount of effort they had put in getting married is actually nothing in comparison to the whole hearted effort by mind , body and soul which is then required to keep the fire burning or to keep the river of love flowing between the ‘wedded lovers.’ 

No one is hundred percent perfect and none is fully misfit ,too. Its, as we name it ,the chemistry between the couple that needs to work. Also, it’s said that we need to take right steps to reach the goal but its also equally ,or even more important to take those right steps in ‘the right direction’. 

............ Read full article at this link of citymag.in



contd ...
Love is to understand each other , without deliberately changing the other . In one of my compositions ,I have said :- 

‘Tamanna tumhaari hi ki thee/chaha bhi tumhe hi tha/fir bhi tum ‘tum’ na rahe, isme tumhaari khta nahin.’ 

Meaning that over a period of time the spouses try to mould and change their counterparts and they themselvescomplaint about and regret the change later. 

Jagjit Singh, the legendary ghazal singer has also ,sung in one of his famous ghazal …. ‘Us mod se shuru Karen fir ye zindgi /har shay jahaan haseen thee /ham tum the ajnabi’ 

So ,dear friends I just wanted to be with you during the times of change ,especially the middle years of life, to chose ,exercise and experiment these following Golden Rules. I am the one who is advocating these rules but all must improvise the tips to suit their own circumstances. And, this does not , at all, mean that my life is a bed of roses but I ,too, confess that one or the other valuable tip given here ,some or the time , comes to our rescue to refresh ,smoothen out our relationships, rejuvenate us and to kindle a flame of longings and desires in times of need. 

• Let the dialogue be on always be it happy time or be it the time of conflicts. 

• Talk and share about each other’s strengths and weaknesses when you two are together. 

• Talk positive about your spouse in front of others. 

•Trust your partner and have confidence in your own love. 

• Celebrate each moment of togetherness and not just the occasions. 

• Don’t restrict the honeymoon to just a few days or a month. Let it continue for the lifetime. 

• Enjoy and celebrate each and every smallest achievement of either of you. Don`t wait for a big event to celebrate. 

• Spend time together to understand each other .Let the discussion be on on a friendly level. 

• Try and experiment the unconventional ways to do away with the routine or boredom. 

• Do take tips from others but improvise them to suit your own circumstances. 

• Be friends in a true sense and let the relationship be informal. 

• Let your attributes supplement each other. Partners should try to fill in the gaps in each other’s personality.//